Why therapy was the best decision I have ever made

By Oksana George

The sunrise I saw after the gym

Introduction

Let me just be real for a second— I used to think therapy was a complete waste of time. Growing up and even into early adulthood, I didn’t believe it would ever actually work. I pictured it as some therapist sitting across from me with a notepad, nodding their head, and asking, “And how does that make you feel?” Like… no thanks. I’d already been through three therapists, and every time, I walked out feeling worse than when I walked in.

I felt stuck, like I was just rehashing the same trauma and leaving with no tools, no guidance—just more emotional weight than I came in with. I’ve always struggled with emotional regulation, negative thoughts, anxiety, and not knowing how to handle big feelings. I used to think I was being “strong” by keeping it all in—slapping on a smile, pretending I was okay—but that always ended in the same thing: a blow-up. A full-blown emotional outburst. Then came the guilt. The shame. The cycle. But the truth is?

I never actually gave therapy a fair shot. I’d quit after 3 or 4 sessions. I wasn’t honest—not with the therapist, and not with myself. And I definitely wasn’t ready. I thought I was doing my best, and I excused my behavior with, “Well, I’m human.” (And sure, I am human… but using that as a pass every time I hurt someone? That’s not growth. That’s denial.) Before I really committed to therapy, I was in a rut. Emotionally wrecked. My head was full of negativity and replaying everything I had done wrong—or all the things that had been done to me. I was drowning in guilt, anger, anxiety, and depression. Some days, I couldn’t even function.

I’d sit alone in my room, spiraling, overthinking, and mentally beating myself up for not being better. It got dark. Really dark. I ended up in the hospital at one point for a mental health evaluation because my thoughts had gotten that heavy. (And yes—PMDD played a part in that too.) The breaking point? It came when I realized I was truly fed up with my own bullsh*t. I couldn’t keep living like that—hurting others, hurting myself, and staying stuck in the same cycles. I needed someone to help me actually unpack this anger, this trauma, and all these emotional explosions I was having.

So, one day—I pulled out my phone, took a deep breath, and typed in: “Therapists near me.” When I had finally found my therapist and had set up the appointment i had my first ever meeting with her in just a couple of week. (I was excited yet nervous) and when that time had came? I didn’t realize how awkward, uncomfortable, but completely life changing it would be. Looking back? I wish I would have started sooner. But again we live and we learn.

My First “Real” Therapy Session (The One That Actually Hit Different)

Walking into this session, I honestly didn’t know what to expect. I was nervous, sure, but also had this little voice in my head saying, “Oh Lord, Oksana, what did you sign yourself up for this time?” I thought it was gonna be the same old story—me sitting there, therapist nodding along, maybe some deep breathing exercises I didn’t ask for. But this time? It hit different. From the moment I met her, I felt something I hadn’t felt with any other therapist before: safe. Like I belonged there. Like she actually saw me and knew what the hell she was doing. We didn’t waste time doing surface-level stuff either.

She looked me dead in the eye and asked, “What are three big goals you want to work on?” And I was like—okay, wow, we’re diving right in. I told her straight up: emotional regulation, managing anxiety, and learning how to problem-solve without spiraling. Boom. That was it. We were locked in. We didn’t even get to finish everything in that first session because she took time to really get to know me and hear some of my past. But still—by the end of that hour, we had those three goals laid out like a foundation. And for the first time ever? I was actually excited to come back.

It felt totally different from the therapists I had before. No shade to them, but the connection just wasn’t there. This one though? She felt right. Like maybe—just maybe—God put her in my life at the exact time I needed her most. She was on top of her stuff too. You could tell she cared. She listened, she challenged me, and she didn’t just sit there nodding with a clipboard. She paid attention.

I even saw her jotting things down when I’d say something important, and to me? That meant everything. And since I’m already an outgoing, outspoken kinda person, it wasn’t awkward for me to open up. I think that helped her too—we just clicked. There was no fakeness, no sugar-coating, just a real-deal vibe between the two of us. That first session gave me something I hadn’t felt in a long time: hope. And let me tell you, that right there? Was the start of real healing.

Why Therapy Was the Best Decision I’ve Ever Made

I’m not even gonna lie—my therapist is one of the best things that’s ever happened to me. Like hands down, no debate. She’s not my friend, she’s not there to sugarcoat things, and she’s definitely not there to stroke my ego. She’s there to challenge me, and baby, that’s exactly what she does. And you know what? I’m so grateful for that. There was this one session where I was venting about someone I’d had issues with for a while. Like, on repeat. I was explaining the situation, how I felt, how I thought they felt… and then she hit me with it. She looked at me and said, “Oksana, what made you think they were truly attacking you?” And I just sat there like… oh damn. Because deep down? I didn’t have a solid answer.

That question rocked me. It forced me to sit with the uncomfortable thought that maybe, just maybe, they weren’t trying to hurt me—maybe they were just looking out for me in their own way. That was a turning point. It was like she went into my brain and started rewiring my entire way of thinking. I had been showing up to session after session talking about the same person, the same situation, stuck on repeat. And instead of shutting it down, she let me talk through it. But when the time was right? She called it out. Not in a mean way. Not in a “you’re the problem” way. But in a loving, wake-up kind of way.

It made me stop and ask myself, “Okay… could I be part of the issue too?” And that was hard. Really hard. But it was necessary. What she’s helped me do is see things from another angle—something I wasn’t even aware I needed. She’s helped me step back, zoom out, and notice my own patterns. Because let’s be real: sometimes we don’t see ourselves clearly when we’re in it. Therapy isn’t just about venting or rehashing the past.

It’s about reflecting, shifting your mindset, and doing the hard internal work. And let me tell you—it’s work. Catching your own patterns? Questioning your reactions? Learning to pause before popping off? Not easy. But it’s been so worth it. And I told her that. I literally looked at her one day and said, “You’re re-wiring my brain.” And she smiled and said, “Mhm. That’s my job. I’m not here to just let you talk and keep blaming everyone else. I’m here to challenge you.” And in that moment? I knew therapy was the best decision I ever made for myself.

What Therapy Started Teaching Me

Whew… therapy has been teaching me a lot. And I mean, a lot. I’m still in the thick of it — it’s a whole journey, not some quick fix. But here’s what I’ve started to pick up along the way: I’m learning how to regulate my emotions (keyword: learning — it’s still a work in progress, okay?), I’m starting to see situations from another angle instead of just reacting on impulse, and I’m finally understanding the power of just pausing.

Like, taking a breath, walking away for a second, and not letting my emotions run the whole show. That alone has been huge. But one of the biggest things? Learning to let go of that ego. You know, that part of me that always had to be right, always had to defend myself, always had to have the last word. Yeah… that had to go. Because that wasn’t helping me grow — it was holding me back. And honestly? These lessons? They’ve already made me a better mom, a better wife, a better friend — just better all around. I’m more present, more aware, and way less reactive than I used to be. This is what rewiring your brain actually looks like. It’s messy. It’s uncomfortable. But it’s so worth it. And if I’m out here doing it — girl, so can you.

What It Looks Like Now

If I’m being real with you — I’m not the same person I was a year ago. Like, not even close. Do I still mess up sometimes? Oh, for sure. But not nearly as much as I used to. And honestly? That’s progress. Therapy didn’t magically fix everything overnight. It’s not some quick little fix-it-all thing — it’s been deep, uncomfortable, soul-searching kind of work.

But it’s hands down one of the best choices I’ve ever made. Because through it, I’ve grown. I’ve learned tools, I’ve gained perspective, and I’ve developed a whole new level of awareness I never had before. And yeah, I still have my moments (don’t we all?) — but now I know how to handle them. I can actually pause, reflect, and work through it instead of blowing up or shutting down. That right there? That’s a huge step for me. And it’s something I’m proud of.

Why I’m Glad I Didn’t Give Up

After all the trial and error with myself over the years… I can finally say I didn’t give up. I showed up. I did the damn thing — even on the days I didn’t feel like talking, even when I didn’t feel like unpacking anything. My therapist still showed up for me, and that’s what kept me coming back. Sticking with therapy wasn’t easy. Like, at all.

I had days where I cried my damn eyes out in front of her, and other days where it felt like, “Okay, this session wasn’t so bad.” But I stayed with it — even when it felt like pulling teeth — and I’m proud of that. If anything from my story sticks with you, let it be this: Don’t give up on yourself. Growth is uncomfortable as hell, but it’s worth it. If this journey does anything, I hope it motivates you to take that first step.

To get honest with yourself. To do the work. And if you do? Don’t expect it to be all Pinterest-worthy and cute. Therapy can be ugly sometimes. It can knock the wind out of you — but that’s when the real work starts. That’s when you begin to heal. And eventually, yeah… you rise. You get stronger. You start becoming the version of you that you were always meant to be. So yeah — I’m really effen glad I didn’t quit.

Closing Thoughts

So if you’ve made it this far — thank you. Seriously. I hope my story showed you that growth isn’t this perfect, pretty process. It’s messy. It’s uncomfortable. It’ll humble you real quick. But it’ll also shape you in the best way if you let it. Therapy wasn’t some magical fix — it was a mirror. It showed me the things I needed to see but didn’t want to. And instead of running from it this time, I faced it.

I chose to grow. And if I could do it — stubborn, emotional, reactive me — then you can too. For real. Whether you’re just starting out, on the fence, or deep in the work — keep going. Healing isn’t a straight line, and you don’t have to have it all figured out right now. Just take the next right step. Keep showing up for yourself, even when it’s hard. And maybe — just maybe — this is your sign to not give up. Because the version of you that’s on the other side of all this work? She’s worth it. You’re worth it.

And as always- with love- Oksana

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